12:33 am - May 16, 2005
Just staple it to my forehead.
Well, I'm officially the family looohoooser. This weekend, both my little brothers graduated from university. At today's victory dinner, everyone kept saying things like, "Hey, college-graduate, pass the salsa," and "Get your elbow out of my margarita, college-graduate!" Er, except to the one member of the family who doesn't have a degree. Ahem. Guess who that might be.
I'm thinking about going to that website that'll ordain you as a minister for $20. I can be a member of the clergy! Respected! Then I won't have to prove I'm smart with a silly diploma, I can just stand on a soapbox at a street corner spewing dogma and quoting Emily Post!
OOoooh. Sorry. I'm a little bitchy from lack of sleep. This place makes me twitchy.
Let's see... what else...
Oh yes, an old friend from high school decided to play chicken with a semi, resulting in a closed-casket service today. Stupid fucker. I hate May. We'll call him Brownie for here. His family is destroyed. His mom's a zombie, his sisters have practically become cartoon characters with all the stars and cuckoos you can see floating around their dazed heads. I suppose it's entirely possible that just because he sped up and turned into the path of the semi, that doesn't mean that he did it on purpose. Maybe he sneezed, causing uncontrollable muscle spasms at just the wrong time. Stupid fucker.
Don't get me wrong. Brownie's a great guy, morphing from shy and awkward to steady and capable in a blink. Sweet, genuinely nice, hint of weirdness, takes care of his mom and sisters... Yeah.
Suicides fucking piss me off, probably because I've seen what happens to the families and friends of someone who is such a moron that they think things are "better this way." Don't get me wrong, I don't bounce around in a cocaine-addicted cheerleader frenzy all the time. I've been there. Hell, I can't drive by a highway overpass without that little niggle of a thought...What if? But I hit my crossroads a while ago. Hard. Yep, I might be a miserable excuse for a human being (depending on my mood and if it's a Wednesday) but regardless of how much my family and friends might wish I might change, they seem to prefer that I stay on this side of the daisies for the next little while, at least.
I'm too pissed off to continue. I'm going to bed.
But I'm going to tell my brothers that I love them, first. Because you never know. If they're thinking about it, I might just be able to guilt them into not. Heh. I'm a sneaky so-and-so.
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